Often, we are so shy or scared to let our feelings out that we miss the chance of experiencing true love. There is a heart-wrenching story of a young girl called Tanu. Tanu was a school going kid when she felt a little something for the boy called Prem from her school. She thought of it as a crush and ignored her feelings. But as years went by, her feelings for Prem got stronger. Even a little glimpse of him would make her day and if some day he was absent from school, she would terribly miss him. She could not define what she was going through, but whatever it was, she was happy with her little secret. Many a times she had thought of confessing her feelings to him but she let fear take over her and never did so. She was always shy and quiet around Prem and never spoke to him even if she desired.
Slowly years passed by and the farewell day arrived. Tanu had made up her mind to confess her love to him that day. Her heart broke when she got to know that he wouldn’t attend the farewell as he suddenly fell ill. She took that as a sign of destiny, and thought that she should forget him. Tanu gave her exams and passed out with flying colors. She joined Medicine and got selected as an intern in one of the reputed hospital.
It was a hot summer day in March, when she learned that a new young patient was admitted in her hospital. When she went to check, she got the shock of her life. It was Prem, her never-confessed, true love. Even after all those years she still couldn’t forget him. She couldn’t believe if all that was happening was real. He no longer looked like the handsome, popular boy that every girl swooned over in school. He had lost weight and his eyes radiated sadness, but what remained from those days was his mischievous smile. When she learnt that he was in the last stage of Colon cancer and had just few more weeks to live, she was shattered. She thought she had moved on but seeing him again, intensified her feelings for him.
Tanu knew that she couldn’t do much as a Doctor, so she decided to spend as much time with him as possible. She was tempted to reveal her side of the story to him but something always stopped her. She would hold his hand and he would sleep peacefully. He found comfort in her and told her how he always felt he was unlovable. “I really like spending time with you” he said one day as he slowly closed his eyes, holding her hand and with that same old smile on his face he passed away peacefully.
Till today, Tanu has one regret that she never told him about her real feelings.
Sometimes we just need to take that risk and let out our feelings as unsaid love is much more painful than unrequited love!
What is love?
Love is one of the most intense emotions each one of us experiences. It could be between two lovers, parents and children, siblings, friends, between a girl and a boy, husband and wife or love could be towards animals or it could be towards self.
Well, the beauty of Love is that it does not change with the context. Love is the purest form of emotion; it is all encompassing, present everywhere. However, the perception of love changes from person to person and with time. I did a small survey to know what ‘love’ means to people from various age groups. The results were quite interesting.
Kids and Toddlers –. When asked, “What love means to them?” their answers were very innocent and precious. Little Nancy says, “Love is when mom lets me watch my favorite cartoon. I love chocolates and playing with my toys. I love games period too.” Vaishnavi interrupts and says, “I love my mummy daddy and my little brother.” When probed the shy one out of the lot, Aasmi with an innocent toothy grin reveals that her love is Maggi noodles. Their real and genuine answers were far too precious to not smile.
Teens/Young adults – Few of them were going through break-ups so for them it was the end of the world. For them love didn’t exist anymore. When talking to these teens and young adults what struck me the most is that their relationship with their friends mattered the most. That is the phase where one is figuring out about their lives and themselves. Love in their minds is what they read in books and watch in movies.
Adults – It was a different experience when I spoke to talk to the adults. Their first preference and priority were their children and their kid’s happiness. Kids were their number one priority, and sacrificing for their benefit is what love meant to them.
Old People – Talking to older people about love transfers you to a world which does not seem real any more. Majority of them equate love with sacrifice, commitment and trust.
I often dismiss the thought that the current generation is unsure when it comes to love, because the times have changed. Now we have options in everything, people are disposable, and real feelings are lost—or so we like to believe. I wonder how the older generation made it look so easy, and how most of their relationships lasted, and are still going strong, while the younger generation can’t even get through the first few stages of dating someone without a whirlwind of questions, confusion, doubt, and mixed signals. It’s becoming exhausting to find someone, and even more exhausting to love them. What was so different back then? Where did we go wrong? How did we lose the essence of love and romance along the way?
There is this one picture I came across where it beautifully gave away what love truly is. ‘There was this old-aged married couple sitting next to each other on a park bench turning their face away from each other. It was raining heavily and the old man was holding an umbrella but what I found astonishing was instead of covering himself with the umbrella he instead was holding it above the old woman’s head.’ This is what true love is and the difference in love between today’s and the old generation… No matter what age or what situation, no matter how many fights and quarrel, the promise to protect each other through thick and thin is what love is. Love is a combination of trust, commitment, being there for each other, easily forgiving each other and so on. The purest form of love doesn’t come with a tag of “T & C apply”. It is unconditional. It is eternal. It is the basic emotion with which we relate to other living beings. The world and everything around us is built on love and in today’s time there is nothing more impactful than spreading love. If you have the ability to make someone happy, do it. Reach out and help others. Heal one another with love. The world needs more of that. Love is here to stay…