Question life at every step

Don’t follow society’s laws blindly. Each life is different.

At the age of 4, your parents enroll you into school. After you pass out of school, you go to college. Even if you graduate, you just have to get a masters degree because you won’t get a good job until you have one. If you can get an MBA, even better! You’ll score an awesome job! After that, you have to get married and within a few years, have children. Now get them admitted into the best schools and colleges, their life depends on it! After that’s settled, get them married. Once you have grand children, hurrah, your life is complete! You can securely retire from your job so you can rest and spend time with your grandchildren. Maybe even use this time to finally think about spirituality, God and death; until the day finally arises, where you have to leave this planet. That’s life, as society dictates it.

Sounds quite fair, if that’s what you want to do in life. But millions of people go through this pre-decided process even without giving a single thought to whether they really want to go through it. Have you ever questioned yourself about what you want?

Think about this, if you only had one year to live, what would you do? In an instant, you would forget everything that anyone has ever told you and think about yourself, your needs and goals. You’d probably make a list too. So why not think about it now?

As a past life regression therapist, I have taken people into their past lives to relieve the negative emotions of those memories. I have noticed that during these sessions, most people die with the regret that they could not do what they wanted to.

That is why it is so important to question ourselves at each and every step. Are you doing something because you really want to do it or because it’s the norm? I have myself faced such a situation and made the wrong decision.

When I was in school, I liked painting, playing cricket and singing more than math and science. After every result day, I’d spend my time cheering up friends and making them smile. I was very happy doing this. But at the end of school, when I had to make a decision about what to study in the future, I was confused. My family said that boys do not take up arts, so that was out of the question. According to them, I should become an engineer or a doctor. All my friends in school signed up for the pre-engineering test, and so did I. To my surprise, I passed the test and got into an engineering college, and became an engineer by default. After passing out of college, I was offered a job in a reputed company in Mumbai, so I took it up. After 17 years in the corporate world, I realized that I am meant to do something else. But it wasn’t too late. I made a correction and became a life coach.

Like me, there are so many people who say they took up the wrong job, made wrong decisions and ended up at the place, far away from where they wanted to be.

This is why it is so important to ask, is this really what I am meant to do? Do I really want to get married, and when? Do I really want to have children, and when? Am I studying something I am interested in? I have finished my education, do I really want to get a job now, or do something else? Don’t follow society’s law blindly. Each life is different.

As parents we need to always support our children with their decisions. The upcoming generation has the potential to break society’s barriers and dogmas which have existed for thousands of years. Don’t label children, who ask why or do only what they want to, as rebellious. They are giving rise to a more inquisitive and progressive society.

 

DIFFERENT KEYS

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Why are we humans always experience conflict with our past self, present self and future self? I discovered that the key to a great life is harmonizing these vital parts or dimensions of our personality. I am an HLP practitioner and I vouch for its effectiveness as it integrates the three dimensions of life into one.

The H of HLP or healing of the past sets the foundation for an enlightening inner journey. Never look back or regret, but keep moving forward. Whatever happens in our life, happens for a reason, which are our lessons. We should always remember that even failure is a path towards success. Thus, acknowledging that we have erred and forgiving ourselves is the basic tool to faster healing. I have introduced several techniques and exercises in the book that gently nudge the hidden hurts from the subconscious into the open, showing you the right way to tackle them. I have extensively spoken about the path towards forgiveness and self-acceptance, through chapters like letting go of past burdens, embracing the inner child and the gift of forgiveness.

The L of HLP; living your present is the second part of the book, which highlights the wonders of living here, now, at this moment. People forget that life actually means the ‘present’ moment. Past and future are not really the life we should bother about as they don’t exist. Through the book I help you find out your true purpose of life. Without that knowledge, the satisfaction of living the right life is lost. One needs to therefore realize the paramount importance of the “here and now”, in the best way possible. In a sensitive way, I give the myriad secrets of discovering your life’s passion and purpose, the power of doing things right now, the secret to being happy any time, and the power of gratitude.

The third section of the book talks about the P of HLP, which is planning the future. For many of us ‘planning for the future’ means either saving money or following a set pattern planted in our minds by elders. Like in the recent movie, Ye Jawaani Hai Deewani actor Ranbir Kapoor says, why would we want to follow a mundane life pattern when we can have some fun? Like finishing studies by a specific age, getting married after you turn 25, then take care of your kids, retire and wait for the angel of death. That doesn’t mean you don’t have this life. However, life is much beyond this monotony. In the book I have made it clear that saving money or following a conventional lifestyle forms only one part of the whole planning process. The really crucial treasures of planning one’s life are: being your own navigator, listening to your inner voice, inviting yourself to practice better faith and acknowledging and cherishing every relationship in your life. I often hear people say they work for 18 hours a day. My question to you: is that success? Spending 80% of your life at work means having 80% of problems at home. Do not choose between your work and family, rather create a balance.

I would quote something that author James Patterson and former Coca-Cola CEO Bryan Dyson has said, life is a game in which you are juggling some five balls in the air. They are work, family, health, friends and spirit; and you are keeping all of these in the air. You will soon understand that work is a rubber ball and it will bounce back even if you drop it. But the other four balls are made of glass. Dropping one of these means they will be irrevocably damaged or even shattered. One must understand that and strive for balance in our life.

Door that led to KEYS

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Though it is an age of fingertip technology and advancement, with solutions to mostly any problems in our life, emotional traumas are not handled easily by us. These days, emotions are the major culprit behind all the issues in our life. Even if the problems are physical like lifestyle related diseases, relationship and situational issues, the root cause has to be our emotions.

These emotions can be the guilt, regrets, anger from our past we are not able to let go off, or the anxiety, fear and insecurities of the future, or jealousy and hatred that can play havoc to ourselves. It is therefore very important to manage our emotions, as our everyday problems like parent-child issues or even suicides and terrorism around the globe is caused by it.

However, I want to make it clear that we are the masters of our own destiny. We can manage our emotions. I wanted to make people realize this. This was the reason I wanted to reach out to people and say that we can heal our emotions. The best way was through my book explaining the same.

I cannot find happiness anywhere but within myself. It is a state of mind. Don’t be sad if you don’t want to be sad. The ‘keys’ are in your hand. You feel how you want to feel.

Through my workshops I realized that people need help in managing their emotions. Also, they don’t understand that every moment that passes becomes past and cannot be retrieved. We are adding a bit to the ‘past’ every second of our life. It is very difficult to get our history back. So instead of worrying about the past, we should embrace the present moment to contribute to a better future.

Thus, the idea to write my book came through my workshops, my friends and people I counsel. Keys was indeed the key to reach out to all of them. I had to make people understand that a balance is very important in life. Whether it’s the balance between the past, present and future or between your work and family life. KEYS gives you that.